5 Things to Do Today to Save Your Relationship - PsychAlive
How can you save a failing relationship and avoid breakup? Here are 12 inspiring tips on how to save your struggling relationship and keep the love alive. The Love Breakthrough That Could Save Your Relationship In my office, I explained to Grace that if she wanted to believe that Adam's actions were wrong, . We talked to a dating professional about how to save a relationship, whether you' re struggling with distance, infidelity, or working on.
7 Ways to Save a Struggling Relationship
Be mindful that forgiveness is a process, not a result, so perform small, daily acts that are reflective of your intent to pardon Alexandra Harra is a best-selling author, professional writer, relationship expert, and certified life coach. Her new book, The Karma Queens' Guide to Relationships, will help you cultivate the relationships you deserve.
Connect with her on Instagram: Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email. After her husband died, I watched my year-old next door neighbor live out halfhearted days in quiet sobs. During one of my visits to her home, she confessed that she spent equal parts of her marriage frustrated as she did happy.
Her pride was not in that she had found a relationship, but in that she had kept it for so long. And the only secret to an everlasting marriage, she revealed, was this: Quick are we to think, "He's no good, I'll dump him and find someone else. We are taught to be independent, and this is an incredible discipline; we are self-made and self-sustainable. But taken to the extreme, this attitude is guaranteed to interfere in our relationships.
No one can be exchanged for anyone else.
Your partner is not a pair of pants you picked up at Macy's. Your partner was placed in your life for a greater reason in divine timing. He or she is a human being brimming with flaws and awful failings Beware of abandoning someone just because they require a bit of inner repair work. This is not to say that you should ever settle for an unhealthy situation, but a successful relationship entails honest work and the payoff can be extraordinarily rewarding in terms of not just finding, but keeping, long-term love.
If you believe you can sift through people until you find the perfect package, you will remain highly disappointed throughout your relationships.
You may find someone different, perhaps a bit better, but who will still need "fixing. And each person we encounter will test our capacity for sacrifice, compromise, patience, and tolerance. A real relationship that endures through time is one in which you have poured forth more love and understanding than you ever thought possible of you.
It's admirable to believe in the unique power of your relationship, and even wiser to realize that no, you won't magically stumble upon a fairytale romance.
If you currently find yourself in a relationship that's weak, broken, or on the brink of collapse, but that you believe deserves your effort, don't give up. Consider these seven ways to save your struggling relationship: Re-evaluate the reasons you're together. Go back to the beginning. What drew me to this person to begin with?
6 Ways To Save Your Struggling Relationship
What qualities did they possess that I found valuable? What made them so amazing? And are they still? Reevaluating the reasons you came together reminds you of the reasons to stay together, and this strengthens your already-existing foundation. Ask your partner what they love and don't love about you; be open to constructive criticism and self-improvement. There is a right way and a wrong way to communicate. The right way is asking your partner a relevant question, listening to their response, then offering your opinion.
The wrong way is overwhelming your partner with your irritations and worries as soon as they walk in from a particularly long workday. Practice effective speech by engaging your loved one in a conversation of their interest. Ask questions that matter to them; people open up when you inquire about their day, an important project, their feelings, etc.
Once you've listened to what they have to say, offer your side of the story. Stay away from heavy conversations in stressful times, and especially in the heat of emotion. Try to offer something that you know will have unique value to them. Engaging in such loving acts actually makes us feel more in love.
People feel most attracted to their partner when they see them as someone separate from themselves, someone they are able to love, respect and appreciate for their unique qualities. We can keep the spark alive by refusing to give up our own, natural desire to express love on a physical level. For most of us slowing down means plopping on the couch or zoning out to the TV the minute our chaotic to-do list is done. No matter how hectic our schedule, there are ways to take pause within our own minds and reconnect with ourselves throughout the day.
In these times of reconnection, we are not only more in touch with ourselves, but we are better able to recognize and be attuned to our partner. We are more mindful of our actions toward them. We are also more aware of our feelings of desire and attraction. When we are more present, we can make an effort to really connect, communicate and make eye contact.
Again, this may feel like a no-brainer, but in truth, looking each other in the eye is one of the things we forget to do on a daily basis. Just looking at our partner and really seeing him or her as a whole person, separate from ourselves, can further rekindle our empathy, interest and attraction. Try something old — As a relationship advances, it becomes all too easy to make excuses not to make time for each other.
When we do get together, we may do things out of a sense of form or obligation.
Relationships tend to start fizzling out when we stop sharing the lively things we used to share with our partner. Moreover, once things start to fizzle out, we become even less inclined to share these activities. We can challenge this by making a commitment to take part in activities we and our partner used to share and enjoy together.
Participating in activities that light us up or that light our partner up helps us stay close with our partner, while feeling the most ourselves.
When we fall in love, we are in a state in which we feel the most open and alive.